A few years ago my brothers and sister were all in Cleveland together for a few days before I arrived. David had recently taken an aversion to anyone using the word ‘should.’  Everyone else had gotten quickly on board, and by the time I got into town, every ‘should’ utterance was immediately echoed by someone else.

“…maybe before you pick that up you should–”

“SHOULD”

“Next time you guys should–“

“SHOULD”

“Mom should really–”

“Lauren, stop should-ing all over the place!”

They all thought this was hilarious.  I was not as amused, but that’s neither here nor there; the   should-y shaming continued our entire time together.  It’s an interesting thing to hone in on and one that persists in my life.  Let’s be honest, no one likes a should-y situation.

Before the power goes out, find the house.  There’s something there inside that will be useful to you in the dawn.

Don’t let yourself continue to sleep so long; repeat the lyrics to your favorite song.  Prepare for flight (an obvious rhyme about casting light).  Prepare for snow, you’re always cold.  Where to go and how and why.  How those birds flap freely in the sky!  Untethered ends

Decorum serves order, simply sung.  Don’t you know you’re not the only one?  Whistling wands create the sun.  Slow it down.  The final plucks.

First voice heard.  humming sweetly starting over | second city of light.

Spring will come, ray by ray.  Bask in brightness, beat your drum.  Summer clouds turn into storms. Bird songs dizzy winding down.

(image via Digital Trends)

I’m slowly making my way through the book Uncreative Writing, which so far talks a lot about the reappropriation of language, text, code, and the like in the digital age.  Somewhat along the same lines, I thought this quick video on the history & future of emoticons and their ability for new expressions of emotion was pretty interesting.  Have you heard of Emoji Dick (a full emoji translation of Moby Dick)?  How does all this new technology make you feel?  🙂  😐  😦

When I flee New York in November, it’s only on the way out that I realize how much I need a break. There’s something about lugging a suitcase down four flights of stairs, already late, that reminds me of how calm it is so many other places.

I pull my suitcase down the street, its wheels rolling unevenly over wet concrete.  After fitting said suitcase under the subway turnstile and carrying it down another set of stairs, I eventually find myself a seat on the train.  It’s then that I realize I’m about to have six! uninterrupted daytime hours to myself, once I make it to the flight.  Almost simultaneously, I realize coffee and croissant do not make for a proper day’s nutritional or caloric intake.

The summer is all outdoors. But once the chill begins, those outdoor hours wane.  I forget how much I need to be outside; I realize I barely noticed the slow effect of my inattention.  I realize I’ve once again lost the balance between healthy downtime and lethargy.

As I’m leaving aloneness I recall the transition that will soon put me back into my family, connecting just long enough for it to be hard to leave.  I’ll come back calmer and more peaceful, and I’ll be ready to take a deep inhale.