(image via here)

“To be mature you have to realize what you value most. It is extraordinary to discover that comparatively few people reach this level of maturity. They seem never to have paused to consider what has value for them. They spend great effort and sometimes make great sacrifices for values that, fundamentally, meet no real needs of their own. Perhaps they have imbibed the values of their particular profession or job, of their community or their neighbors, of their parents or family. Not to arrive at a clear understanding of one’s own values is a tragic waste. You have missed the whole point of what life is for.”

- Eleanor Roosevelt

I receive Gretchen Rubin’s daily Moment of Happiness email in my inbox each morning. Yesterday’s message was the above quote by Eleanor Roosevelt.  I spent the whole day thinking back on it and trying to consider whether I’m prioritizing the things I value most.  The idea also reminded me of something I heard before about personal finances, and how your spending habits serve as a reflection of what you’re prioritizing in your life, consciously or otherwise.

(image via here)

The one where I’ve climbed to the top of a steep outdoor staircase, the others in line behind me, and it’s my turn to transfer onto the wobbly, metal platform adjacent to the stairs.  Most of them are encouraging me, even cheering me on. But I’m stalling and anxious until, at an unpredictable moment, I clumsily make the transition.  Once I’ve reached the other side, the only one who acted impatient and unsupportive started telling the rest of us who we were & what she thought of us.  To me she said, “You are the same as me.”  This was certainly not a compliment and I didn’t receive it as such.

When I woke, still aware of the terror I felt by the height of the stairs and the unsteadiness of the metal platform, as well as my indignance at her words, I thought of my family and the saying we learned together: First you mock the position, then you’re in the position.

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As If It Were A Dream is an ongoing series in which I will pair an image with some of my own writings. Previous installments: 1 / 2 / 3 / 4

I am home.

There is something so dainty and girlie about my childhood bedroom that I never fully resonated with until I got a bit older. It is funny how now, at a time when I care about design and aesthetics, I fully feel at ease in the room that has been mine my entire life.

Though there were times when I cursed the wallpaper while blasting Bush or dying my hair with Kool-Aid – it is now in my adult life that I fully embrace the softness that comes up in me when I am in this room.